Attraction. Its a word that is so simple and is used everyday by everyone. In life, we normally use the word attraction when we are talking about the opposite sex (or same sex). We use it to describe a feeling we get in our stomachs when we like someone or when we are captured by someone. It isn't a hard thing to feel. And most of the time we can't control it. It is just something that we all feel towards someone else no matter who they are.
Recently, I've come face to face with attraction with someone I've known for quite a few years now and although we barely talk or hang out there's always an instance when we do talk and hang out that that attraction comes racing back to me and it is so very hard to deny and push away. This person I can talk to about everything and anything and not feel judged because they feel just as comfortable talking to me about everything and anything as well. That makes it easier, but also harder at the same time because that just makes the attraction stronger.
But here's the funny thing about attraction...you never know if the other person feels it too and that part will always keep you guessing and a little bit secure. It is difficult to know that you have an attraction for someone but don't know if they have it back. You will never know, unless either you or the other person says so. And until that happens your left clueless which ultimately is not the greatest place to be when it comes to relationships. Because in relationships as humans we like to know everything and have it all right there on the table with nothing to hide so that we don't get hurt. Unfortunately that is never the case and as humans we get hurt its just inevitable.
Have you ever encountered something like this? Tell me your story.
At the same time recently, I've encountered that I've been feeling guilt. And normally I don't regret anything because I make my own decisions and even if other don't approve or agree with me my decisions are my own and for my well being not theirs.
...but yet here I am stating that I feel guilty over one of my decisions and as I've come to realize I handle that guilt by baring it deep with in me and not telling anyone and hoping it will go away. Sad part is...it doesn't. And not I just feel worse. I feel guilty because I hurt someone un-necessarily and its taken me this long to realize that I could've handled the situation way better, but I didn't and I feel dumb for not realizing sooner.
Let me tell you this, if you ever feel guilty about anything you have done never ever apologize for what you've done. Only learn to accept the guilt and use it to make you a better person in the future so that you never regret or feel guilty for the same thing again.
That's what I will be doing and have been doing, and I can honestly say that I have been feeling better about the situation and myself.
My Advice: Don't deny the inevitable of falling to the feelings of attraction. Don't ever feel the need to apologize for your actions, just accept them.
Sincerely,
Nina <3
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